Just the Cat's Pyjamas

This blog post includes discussion of suicidal ideation. Please be advised. If you are thinking of harming yourself or are concerned about someone you love, please utilize the resources below. National Suicide Prevention Lifeline [USA] Call :  1-800-273-8255 Website :  https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org Chat :  https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• I was admitted to a psychiatric hospital in December 2009 following a summer filled with raging manic energy and then that inevitable crash into the darkest suicidal depression I have ever experienced. I spent about five days in the hospital, where I received a diagnosis of bipolar disorder. My diagnosis has changed a couple times and it's been added to since then, but that was the beginning of this journey back to wellness on which I still find myself. I have always written in diaries and journals, and below you will find scattered entries and random documents I scribbled into t...

Please enjoy this short selection of miscellaneous poetic works by the Author of this blog. I am naked hungry and afraid Dark. So dark.  The scent of cedar Mildew and rot.  Decay.  I am alone.  So lonely.  I am afraid.  The taste of rust acrid in the air as mud and rain pour from  my feeble wrists into a river.  A rumble.  A crack!  Illumination.  I am the last of my kind.  Endangered.  Endangered?  I am extinct.  I long to consume you. Flesh, blood and bone. Watch, as I unhinge my jaw and swallow you whole. You do not struggle. You allow yourself to be taken in. Your flesh will be my flesh, your bones will be my bones. I will consume you. I long to be crushed. I long to suffocate under the weight of it all. To slowly be smothered. I long to feel my bones shatter as I am pressed. I long to feel the last shallow breath escape my lungs. I long to submit to the hopelessness. I long to be numb. I a...